In a perfect world, we would all eat meals and snacks that are convenient, taste great and provide optimal nutrition.

In reality, however, there are tradeoffs. We crave ice cream, chips and candy bars, which make carbs and fat easy to over-consume. Meeting protein goals, meanwhile, can require conscientious effort, particularly for those, like your author, who aren’t keen on eating lots of meat.

Fortunately, as we chronicled earlier this week, both startups and established food brands are making it simpler than ever to up protein intake. From sodas to snack bars to ice cream, it’s now possible to get a fix of this coveted macronutrient with foods and drinks more commonly associated with sugar, starch and fat.

The looming question is: Do they taste good? To find out, we hit up a local Target for a selection of protein foods sold by venture-backed startups. I and a 10-year-old then subjected them to a taste test.

The verdict? Most of this stuff is indeed edible and drinkable, albeit almost never nearly as tasty as the more protein-deficient alternatives, with just one exception.

Our findings below:

No. 1: David Vanilla Bean Frozen Dessert: Anyone who buys or consumes this particular ice cream alternative will be doing so for the nutritional content, not the taste. A single pint packs in a whopping 30 grams of protein and has just 210 calories. The texture is also on point, creamy and easy to spoon, with a distinct vanilla flavor.

That said, you can’t hide the fact that this is not a product made with your typical ice cream ingredients. Those who don’t like artificial sweeteners or the flavor and texture of whey protein will want to pass. For myself and my co-taster, however, it was a reasonably appealing eating experience. Not as good as traditional ice cream, but not bad for a high-protein food.

Made by: Medici Brands (David parent company).

No. 2 SkyPop Protein Soda: The nutritional stats for SkyPop Protein Soda are also remarkable. A 12-ounce can has just 45 calories, with 10 grams of protein and a single gram of carbohydrates. It’s also properly fizzy, and makes a satisfying pop when you open the can.

But what about flavor? Our local store only had the Ice Pop flavor in stock and it was, in both tasters’ view, not horrible but not something we’d plan to buy regularly. I could see consuming it when on a clear fluids diet, as is the case before some medical procedures, as it’d be one of the few available sources of protein.

Made by: SkyPop (formerly Don’t Quit)

No. 3: Khloud Protein Popcorn: Unlike many of our other featured foods, Khloud Protein Popcorn isn’t a super protein-rich offering. A serving contains 7 grams of protein and 160 calories, most of which come from carbs and fat. Still, its protein count is higher than other packaged popcorn, which typically has maybe 2 protein grams in a comparable serving.

Overall, the tasters’ conclusion, from our trial of White Cheddar Khloud, was that this is a decent snack food. The flavor of milk protein and whey protein concentrate was palpable, but not overwhelming. It’s not exactly a snack food to savor, but for something to casually munch at one’s desk or while watching a show, it served its purpose.

Made by: Khloud

No. 4 Mosh: In the third season of “The White Lotus”, Mosh co-founder Patrick Schwarzenegger plays a fitness and finance bro who makes a daily high-protein shake that other family members find revolting. Perhaps this was inspired by Mosh, the brain-supporting protein bar startup he launched with his mother, Maria Shriver.

The Mosh bar, which we purchased in the peanut butter cup flavor, crams 20 grams of protein, 6 grams of fiber, plus brain-supporting ingredients like creatine and lion’s mane, into a compact, shelf-stable bar. It’s an impressive feat. Yet while our brains’ may have appreciated the nutrition and supplement boost the Mosh bar provided, our taste buds decidedly did not.

I’d put Mosh in the functional food category. It’s something that you might eat if you wanted that particular nutrient mix. But it’s not something to consume for pleasure.

Made by: Mosh

No. 5 Cadootz Crackers: We tried two varieties of Cadootz Crackers — cheddar and sea salt — and walked away neither enthused nor repulsed.

For people interested in a gluten- and seed oil-free small snack cracker with about 5 grams of protein per serving, Cadootz rises to the occasion. It’s got a nice crunch and decent flavor.

As someone who’s not particularly seeking to avoid gluten and seed oils or to get a modest protein bump from my crackers, I’ll probably pass on follow-on purchases. But for its target audience, Cadootz should serve well.

Made by: Cadootz!

No. 6 Frozen One: For those who thought the David frozen dessert was a marvel of protein engineering, the folks at Frozen One would like a word. Their protein ice cream has a whopping 40 grams of protein in each pint.

Yes, but how does it taste? Not that bad, according to our two-person tasting team. We tried both the chocolate and apple pie varieties, preferring the former. Like the David offering, Frozen One tastes like a product made with milk protein concentrate and sugar substitutes. You won’t mistake it for Ben and Jerry’s. But if the goal is to consume a steak-like quantity of protein in the form factor of a pint of ice cream, it does its job.

Made by: Frozen One

No. 7 Brami Protein Pasta: We saved the best for last. That, unexpectedly, was Brami Protein Pasta, a noodle made from semolina and lupini beans that boasts about 70% more protein than standard pasta and more than double the fiber.

With about 12 grams of protein for a 200 calorie serving, Brami isn’t a dense protein source. But, with the right topping, it’s enough to transform a typically starchy noodle meal into something reasonably protein rich.

Most notably, however, Brami tastes quite good, with no discernable weird aftertaste or texture issues. I made both standard and Brami noodles to taste the difference. For seconds, I went with the Brami.

Made by: Brami

Related Crunchbase query:

Related reading:

Illustration: Dom Guzman